Feb 18, 2011

Drunk True Story

Well Well this story comes from a long way back, you might call it my younger, more adventurous time in my life. This is the solid truth and names have not been changed….

It all started while we were having a very good party, there was a overflow of booze and laughter. Playing beer pong and having tequila shots was always a winner in my books. Eventually later in the night as everyone got more buzzed , Ballie comes up with a great idea, “let’s go to the sea and swim.”( We were still in Pretoria North FYI), everyone just laughed at the idea thinking it could be funny  but not really considering it.

So as the night  progressed , people started to pass out, Louen and Deon passed out  infront of PS3 still playing a rally game, and my good friend Allan kept talking how awesome it would be to pass out and wake up on the beach ,so that led to another thing, eventually he passed out on the garden couch(yes there was a couch in the garden at that time).

After zero thought and joy in our hearts we decided to pack and go swim in the sea , we grabbed Allan that was passed out on the couch, he was only in his boxers and Crocs(don’t judge), the smallest guys carried him to the car(sorry Werner and Marinus).

We actually had a good damn plan in our minds, Ballie had to get the drinks( he grabbed a bottle of JB whiskey, Jack Daniels and a good ol’ Wellington, forgot the mixers) and I had to get blankets and for some or other reason I grabbed 20 T-shirts  (again, don’t judge) and forgot the blankets!

And so we were off in the middle of the night, probably around 12 o’clock with Rise Against full blast in the car and the clean whiskey flowing down our throats, it came back up through *Ballie’s throat against the roof of the car , and we were probably driving for 5min….

*Let me first tell you how Ballie’s night went before this, he passed out, woke up, made out with a girl , passed out again, threw up and got a A+ on Dance Dance revolution, so it was pretty wicked before “Die Groot Trek”.

Back to the story, we were around Joburg or in that area when the first piss stop had to happen next to the highway, Allen unaware of all our intentions , just got out ,did his thing , climbed back in the car before passing out again. We had to stop for fuel as well so we got out , paid (I think ) for the gas and gave the friendly petrol attendant half a bottle of Brannas and bought R200 of chips at Wimpy……yes it was a fuck load of Chips.

The next stop could just be described as truly one of the funniest moments in my life, we got out yet again for urinating purposes. Allan climbed out of the car,still pissed out of his mind ,stood under the road sign and did his thing yet again……please people just picture a person fully unaware where he is , thinking he is still in Pretoria , looking up to a road sign and seeing Durban 73km……

If you enjoyed it so far, next week I will be putting up the rest of this amazing story. It will be including metro police, Jack Daniels , puke, “oh fuck” , traffic barriers , cows and money lost.


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